Friday, February 20, 2009

I am missing Scott today.

I have become obsessed with the blog "le love"...she posts pics of couples and love and sometimes quotes... the photos are beautiful and touching. Sometimes, however, they connect with a memory. not a specific moment or anything vivid... just ... an emotion. a realization that I've been there before...back in more innocent times, when relationships are new.

Other times, I can connect with the emotions I feel now...a more mature love. A longing to be with him, while understand why he's not here.

I've decided to post a few of my favorites. Maybe I'll comment on them. Maybe I won't. I haven't decided that yet.
I love that this couple is wrapped up in each other, solitary on the beach. It reminds me of the Garth Brooks song "wrapped up in you"...

How I feel sometimes when Scott leaves. I don't want to say goodbye. I start the anxiety a day or two before crew change. I start preparing myself for his departure. Most people think I handle it well, and I guess that's the coping mechanism, but it's definitely hard, no matter how many times he goes. I can't say too much, though, because he's the one leaving his home, wife, dog, to go live on a ship for a month, "alone", with a bunch of "strangers.


I still haven't figured out why I love this photo so much. I am drawn to it. I think it's the honesty in their faces. She is simply content to be in his arms. Hiding nothing. He is happy holding her. There is a storm outside, but it doesn't make any difference to them. It's not gooey, sappy love or anything. It's real. Rain and all.